Every year I do a post on my year in retrospect. This year, I thought I’d try something different. Instead of writing, I thought I’d draw out the main things that happened this year for me.
When I was a child, I wanted to grow up quickly. I wanted to be able to go out and not have a curfew. I wanted to have more spending money. At 15, it looked like being older, of being of age, seemed like a really wonderful thing. Something to look forward to.
At 31, I wonder more than once if I’m already an adult or am I still the same child. My parents still ask me where I’m going and what time I’ll be back. I still like getting ice cream from the ice cream vendors by the Singapore River. My mom still tells me to eat my vegetables and not play with my food.
But then, there’s the proverbial marriage questions that are coming more frequently.My mother’s absolutely unsubtle mentions of a son-in-law and grandkids. My sisters’ insistence for me to move out of the house so that they can have my room.
So when do you know that you’re an adult?
Lately I’ve been gloating over stuff that I should be totally over with. However, without that incident, I wouldn’t have gotten the wonderful things in my life.
I read somewhere that God doesn’t give you what you want, only what you need. I didn’t realise what I needed until He gave it to me.
I know it gets a little old but I’m thankful for Dude. Thankful that he puts up with my little idiosyncracies with only a raised eyebrow. If you’d known me in person for more than 2 years, you’d see how much I’ve changed.
I’m thankful for NaNoWriMo; for showing me that yes, I can write a novel in a month. It’s not even a good novel but at least, I can look back at it in a few months and beat it into something that is more coherent and maybe, some day, get it published. NaNoWriMo also introduced to me to my wonderful friends who don’t judge, who are there when you need to talk to, people to bounce off writing ideas, people to do crazy ass shit with. Overall, awesome, awesome people whom I would never have met if it weren’t for NaNoWriMo.
I’m thankful for Twitter and Tumblr. I’ve ‘met’ a number of people with the same interests, similar passions and really interesting people in. All of that in the past year. Maybe it’s because I’m spending more time online or just that it happens that I’m finding more interesting people. What ever it is, I’m thankful that I’m learning a lot from Twitter on most days, and I’m thankful that there’s a whole lot of people on Tumblr that I can share my FEEELS with.
I’m thankful that while I may not be able to afford my dream home, I’ll be able to still afford a home. It’ll be a small one, a starter home I’d like to call it. Just big enough for us and our kids when they come a long. In the mean time, keep on saving!
There are more things that I’m thankful for but I’d leave it here for now.
Are you thankful for anything this week?
I turned 31 this past weekend. It didn’t feel any different from any other year. I didn’t feel any older or wiser. I didn’t feel the urge to act my age, not that I even know what people in their 30s are supposed to act like.
What I did have was fun. A lot of fun. I don’t know how other people celebrate their birthdays but I’m very easy going with my birthday. The only mistake I did was to ask Dude what he’s got planned for my birthday. After asking a few times, he said that he was getting me a Happy Meal and that was it. I thought he was joking about the Happy Meal, but he wasn’t.
I really did get a Happy Meal.
I love snail mail, especially when they’re packages sent by a dear friend. Last week, I had a pleasant surprise when I received an email to collect a package from the reception desk. I went down and found a package the size of a loaf of bread, waiting for me.
Inside the package I found a lovingly wrapped teacup, a handful of chocolates and photographs; a lot of photographs of my friend and her family. It was lovely!
I’ve missed my dear friend ever since she went back to the States. Starbucks was our thing. Now, I can’t go to a Starbucks without thinking about her. I’ve watched her kids grow up via her blog and experience every heartache and joy with her. More than once a month I wish that Ohio was only a short train ride away, just so that I can come over and visit her and her family and vice versa.
Now that I’m a lot freer, I foresee a return package and some postcards coming her way.
My sisters and I don’t have a close relationship with my paternal side of the family due to the fact that we live in Singapore and we rarely get to meet all of them since they live all over the Malaysian Peninsula and for a time, even West Malaysia. On the rare occasions that we meet them during festivities, it’s always been awkward and it takes time for us to warm up to each other. It doesn’t help that my sisters and I are not super comfortable with speaking in Malay and my cousins speak predominantly in Malay.
In reason years, as we’ve entered adulthood, I find it easier to talk to them. Maybe it’s just all of us maturing or just that we realised how important it is to keep the family ties, we no longer have the awkward first few moments. We just carry on like we’ve not seen each in other for at least half a decade. It’s an interesting revelation.
I’ve only started adding my paternal cousins on Facebook, the easiest way to connect with them. I’m actually looking forward to having more interaction them with them more often than just during the family reunions every few years.
This holy month of Ramadan has brought many things that I should be thankful for.
I’m most thankful that school is done. No more classes. No more projects. I don’t have to go to school anymore unless I decide to some time in the far future.
I’m thankful for the good health of my family. My grandmother may still be bed bound but she’s as healthy as she can be in that state. She may not be able to speak to us but the smile in her eyes never fails to cheer us up. This year is my mom’s 5th year post mastectomy and I’m very, very thankful that she’s strong and healthy.
I’m thankful for our wonderful Bibik who not only takes care of my grandmother when we’re at work, but also takes care of us. Because of her, there’s always good food at home, we can forget our keys once in a while and our clothes get cleaned and ironed.
I’m thankful for my good health, my job and Dude.