It’s been a week since I’ve decided to put on the hijab. My parents have been trying to convince me to put on the hijab since I was in my teens but I’ve always said no. I’ve always felt that is a commitment that one does not take lightly because it’s a commitment to your faith. I wasn’t ready for this commitment until now. It’s been challenging but it’s something that I’ve been considering for a long while. It started with a click in my heart and head but I didn’t do anything about it. One of the first and biggest challenges that I had in my journey was convincing my husband that I want to do this. It’s hard to tell him why when I can’t even verbalise it to myself. And so, I stopped thinking about it for a while.
When the new year rolled in, and my mother-in-law returned from her trip to the Holy Land, I started thinking about the hijab again and this time, I couldn’t shake the feeling. I couldn’t start wearing it even if I wanted to because I didn’t have any in the house. During those initial months when I started to seriously consider putting on the hijab, I talked a friend of mine who had also recently put on a hijab. She gave me some good tips on what essentials I needed and what I needed to do to change my outfits.
So a shopping spree was needed, not to get just the head gear but also other things like long sleeved shirts to wear under my t-shirts (I have a lot of fandom ones and I want willing to give them up) and little scarves to wear under the normal ones. The next order of business was to learn how to put it on. Thankfully, there are YouTube videos and Pinterest pins that help with that. Fortunately, my sister introduced me to a few online stores where I can get more things I needed.
When I went to work on the first day with my hijab on, everyone was shocked. Though the one who was most shocked was the husband as he thought it was just an occasional thing, but he was very supportive of me when I told him that it was going to be a permenant thing. My non-Muslim colleagues were very curious as to why I would put on a hijab because I was still hijab-free the Friday before. Even close friends were surprised. One of them wanted to be sure if it was something that I wanted to do willingly or was it something that was imposed on me by the husband. The only ones who didn’t ask were my Muslim colleagues. Even my boss couldn’t recognise me.
It has been a big adjustment for me; spending more time in the morning to get ready, adjusting the scarf throughout the entire day, and choosing outfits that are more modest. It gets a little uncomfortable at times because the scarf is too tight or it gets a little too warm. The good thing is i don’t have to worry about my hair when I go out as it’s covered. I’m incorporating more colours into my outfits as well, instead of wearing just black or blue.
Overall, my choice to put on the hijab doesn’t change who I am, just more covered up.